Nothing is funny. I just didn't know how to start this off. I want to clean the kitchen and tidy up a bit around here but I know that's now gonna happen right now so I'll just blog.
Right now I am going to talk about marriage. I am nowhere near marriage and have no experience in the marriage department... so what better person to discuss it, right? Ha ha I am dumb. So here goes...
My view on marriage is really simple. I think people should marry the person they love when the time is right for them. I really dislike how society and the media portrays marriage these days. They make it seem like once you get married your life is over and the unhappiness begins and it will end in divorce anyway. Hearing people say this just breaks my hopeless romantic heart.
Pretty much, I think your marriage is what you put into it. If you want a happy, loving, exciting marriage then you are going to have to put that exact effort into it. But if you think marriage is the end of your "life" and nothing great happens after you are married, then that will probably happen and you shouldn't be getting married. I understand that some marriages have really tough issues that have no other choice but to be resolved by divorce but I don't like hearing people talking as if divorce these days are inevitable. Relationships aren't 50/50, they are 100/100. Relationships are hard work and require a daily effort, as long as both people in the relationship are willing to put in that effort, it can be a happily ever after.
As for the people who think "life is over" once you say "I do" is just ridiculous. You have control over what you do in your life and in your free time and in the marriage/relationship. If you still want to do fun things after you are married then do them. Marriage doesn't have to be "yours" and "mine", it is about compromise and making things work.
Again, I have no experience in this stuff, these are just my thoughts. Just please don't tell me that marriage is useless and you will just get a divorce anyway. It will make me cry.
Right now I am going to talk about marriage. I am nowhere near marriage and have no experience in the marriage department... so what better person to discuss it, right? Ha ha I am dumb. So here goes...
My view on marriage is really simple. I think people should marry the person they love when the time is right for them. I really dislike how society and the media portrays marriage these days. They make it seem like once you get married your life is over and the unhappiness begins and it will end in divorce anyway. Hearing people say this just breaks my hopeless romantic heart.
Pretty much, I think your marriage is what you put into it. If you want a happy, loving, exciting marriage then you are going to have to put that exact effort into it. But if you think marriage is the end of your "life" and nothing great happens after you are married, then that will probably happen and you shouldn't be getting married. I understand that some marriages have really tough issues that have no other choice but to be resolved by divorce but I don't like hearing people talking as if divorce these days are inevitable. Relationships aren't 50/50, they are 100/100. Relationships are hard work and require a daily effort, as long as both people in the relationship are willing to put in that effort, it can be a happily ever after.
As for the people who think "life is over" once you say "I do" is just ridiculous. You have control over what you do in your life and in your free time and in the marriage/relationship. If you still want to do fun things after you are married then do them. Marriage doesn't have to be "yours" and "mine", it is about compromise and making things work.
Again, I have no experience in this stuff, these are just my thoughts. Just please don't tell me that marriage is useless and you will just get a divorce anyway. It will make me cry.
3 comments:
i just like this post. maybe it's because i feel the same way. i really hate the way media portrays marriage in today's society. they make it seem so temporary and divorce is an easy fix for silly problems. it's hard. everyone needs to realize that. it takes work. but that's what makes it worth it.
My parents have been married for 30 years...that gives me hope that one day I will find a man who is perfect for me and when we marry, it'll be for life. Marriage will be just another chapter of life :)
That is so weird that you are talking about this! I just got engaged 2 weeks ago, and I've been having weird anxiety over the stereotypes that marriage has. I don't have a lot of healthy examples of good marriages, and I have spent my time defining our relationship in terms of what I DON'T want. I've been hearing the "welcome to the end" comments and it is terribly disheartening. And social media? Forget it. All I have to do is sit down to watch ANY television show and my anxiety boils over.
But the thing is, all it takes is me sitting down with the man I love and having a heart to heart about these concerns to know that that isn't us. We are the same people as we were when we were "just dating", and we've only become better since we've met. Being engaged hasn't changed anything except now I have a ring I'll wear forever and we get to plan a big ass party for next summer.
It makes me want to cry sometimes too. But really, if you find someone who makes you more true to yourself, then that's all it really takes. And that's all that really matters.
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