hammocks.

Oh yes, please!

Where will you find me tonight?

Ideally:

In a hammock with some red velvet cake batter and/or cupcakes.

Realistically:

In my apartment. Not in a hammock.

Sigh.

if i'm free, it's because i'm always running.

I apologize. I haven't had anything worth sharing lately except for little bits of nothing that nobody would care to read even if those little bits of nothing and Rebecca Black's  Friday.were the only two things left in the world to read.

So, let me arrive to the point of the post. There isn't one. Instead of continuing to neglect this blog, I will just spew some of my thoughts on here.

Sixteen years later and I still have a *cough* large crush on Eric from The Little Mermaid. You can keep giving me that look Reader... but we all know that you've had a crush on a cartoon before too! I mean, look how much he loves his dog, Max. I know he was hypnotized/seduced by Ariel's voice via Ursula in another body, but he was helpless and that can happen to anybody. Did it scare anybody else when Ursula basically erupts from that normal looking decoy body at their wedding and turns back into the half fat lady-half octopus that she is? Oh and I totally had a dinglehopper when I was little. Anyways, yeah, I still love Eric. And I love whoever created this Eric loving mural:

What do you do when you are stuck at work with nothing to do and can no longer pretend to be busy? Well, besides being unexpectedly overjoyed and spreading the news that the new vending machine is carrying the orange drink Sunkist (!!!), you make play lists on your iPod. That's what you do. I think I made roughly four today and all four of those were featuring this song:

This song is kind of strange to me. I can see my having it played at my wedding if I ever get married and I can also see it probably being played at my funeral (or any funeral for that matter) if my friends and family love me enough to plan a funeral for me after I die.

Well I guess that was only two thoughts, but I really have to go dry my hair before it looks more like a blonde mop.

bits of my weekend.

I loved this weekend because:

1. It was spent down in Moab, Utah. For those of you not familiar with Utah... Moab is basically a place full of outdoor activities, hippies, Subarus, Hummers (gag), heat, gift shops, cheap motels, red rocks, dirt, and Delicate Arch (the arch that is on our state license plate).

2. I faced the torturous hike to Delicate Arch. One water bottle and many rest stops later, I was finally there. See? Lazy people can hike too.

3. I licked my way through a Superman ice cream, and oh yes, it was with a waffle cone.

4. I saw a Bassador. What is a Bassador? Well, a Bassador is, are you ready? A Basset Hound Dog mixed with a Lab! I didn't know I was capable of giving so many hugs to a dog I didn't even know.

5. We went off-roading. Have you ever tried eating Chex Mix while going over large rocks at 15mph in an SUV? Well, it's messy.

I didn't love this weekend because:

1. After staring at the spot on the wall right above my laptop screen for a few minutes, I can't really think of anything I didn't like about this weekend. Oh, except that I forgot my swimsuit so I had to sit in a chair extremely close to the hot tub. I basically felt like a mom who had to supervise.

Prepare to be overwhelmed with nature photos..

 NATURE!!

that day was mine.

Just so you know

I loved everything about today.

-the spectacular weather
-the text messages
-my outfit
-the wonderful food
-the people
-work (shocking, i know)
-the music that came on during my shuffle on my ipod
-the everything

when photos become accidental.

You probably didn't know this, because well, I didn't know this, but my laptop has a photobooth thingy. Yeah, a THINGY. I made this discovery while snooping around my laptop that I've owned since 2009. TA DAAAA! I went two years without this photobooth thingy and maybe here is why...

This is the outcome of my first attempt:

Doh!

And my second attempt:

Double DOH! 

Better luck next time, they say. Anyways, in the meantime, this book down there came in the mail over the weekend. What does this mean? It means that I am very happy-excited-thrilled-eager-anxious-hungry-curious-nervous-enthused-emotional. But I always get that way when something comes in the mail.

I've read and absolutely adored a book I read by this author before, Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. I spoke briefly of it here and here.

3 years ago today.

March 22nd, 2008.

Three years ago today I was [not so patiently] waiting in my room for Steve to come pick me up.
Three years ago today I was insulting and shouting at my hair through the mirror for not behaving.

Three years ago today I was lecturing myself to not bring up the discussion Harry Potter the entire time cause I didn't think Steve liked Harry Potter.
Three years ago today I was peeking out of my window waiting to see his car turn down my street... and because the neighbors precious dog was playing in the street.

Three years ago today I was jumping up and down and squeeling from nervousness when I saw him finally turn down my street.
Three years ago today I was hoping Steve would see the neighbors dog and avoid running it over.
 Three years ago today I was annoyed that I was acting this way for a date.

Three years ago today I acted calm and like I wasn't just hyperventilating in my room minutes ago when he came to the front door.
Three years ago my heart melted and eyes teared up (not really) from happiness and pure joy when Steve brought up a discussion of Harry Potter.

Three years ago today I stayed out til 3AM with Steve talking. Well I was talking, he was probably wondering if I ever stopped talking and if it would be rude of him if he abandoned me there by the fire we built so he could go home and sleep.

I know I fell in love with Steve before he fell in love with me, but the girl in me waited til he said it first.
Everyone on the count of three say aw, 1,2,3 AAWWWW!

To Steve:

I want to tell you something today that I have never told you and this is what I came up with: I love the ring you got me when you were living in New York and that I still wear it everyday.

Edit:
 Guess what lucky girl got these as a surprise?

hello, darkness my old friend....

If you've read this blog before, you already know that I am a very sensitive and at sometimes, a very mopey kind of girl. And when I'm feeling mopey, I embrace it! I don't try and fool myself. I simply embrace it and walk around alone with my head down in the rain. And I do agree with you Reader, this doesn't sound healthy at all, but I think I read something somewhere once (please ignore the vagueness of that) that sometimes you have to allow yourself to be sad and cry. But who knows, I could be making that up.

So. My week took a nasty turn about Tuesday. I found myself not laughing hysterically at my favorite Youtube video:

I found myself listening to I Am A Rock and Sound of Silence by Simon and Garfunkel. I even found myself non-amused when I saw my favorite dog in my neighborhood, a 10 year old Beagle, walking around wearing a sweater vest with his adorable sinister glare.

Lastly, I did what the healthy thing to do is and I made a list of Things on the brightside or Things that aren't completely lame and don't make me cry in the shower... and here is what my list looked like:

1.

2.

3.

Yeah, I didn't come up with anything. But good news is, I watched that Youtube video as I posted it and I did laugh.

Cheers to a better week.

Oh and I am a total silly Youtube video junkie, so if you have any videos that you've been cracking up and calling people saying YOU HAVE TO WATCH THIS!! please share them with meeee.

and i quote.

“A guy and a girl can be just friends, but at one point or another, they will fall for each other...Maybe temporarily, maybe at the wrong time, maybe too late, or maybe forever.”

DAVE MATTHEWS

 

photo of the day #102

Me oh my! Now this is how musical chairs should be played! If your game of musical chairs isn't this intense, you aren't playing it right.

killing time can be fun

So I have this friend and her name is Kylee. I was with her, along with some other friends over the weekend and she made up this fantastic game while we were waiting for 10pm to come.

Now, before I share this truly wonderful game of hers, I will share why were all waiting for 10pm to come.

We were at this fine pizza joint a few blocks from my apartment, The Pie. If you live in Utah, go to it now. No, no, no, that thing you have to do can wait, Reader. Finish doing that thing later and go to the Pie now. You will probably see me there with a mouth full of pizza and writing my name on the wall, because you can write on the walls there. But you can't write on the railings outside. They frown upon that. And will shout at you to stop as they are sternly pointing in the other direction hinting that you should probably leave now.

So there we were, downstairs at the Pie, eating our cheese pull-a-parts & BBQ chicken Pizza, people watching and sweating. Yes, sweating. It surely gets hot down there and eating pizza while simultaneously people watching is tiring. I was especially hot because I was the one who had to go to the little window thingy to get our food, not one, not two, not three but FOUR times. Curse me for choosing the seat that has the easiest access to get maneuver out of. And curse me again for forgetting to pick up some plates. And again for forgetting the silverware.

6:22pm Lisa: “I have to go this girl’s birthday party that I work with. I told her I would go. We will go in, say hi, and then leave.”

6:22pm Everyone else: “What time is it at?”

6:23pm Lisa: “Like ten. It’s at the Metropolitan.”

We had one whole pizza left, minus one piece. I was challenged (by myself) to eat the rest of it, if someone would reward me handsomely. However, none of the offers were impressive or tempting, so I said no the pizza eating challenge.

At about 7:39pm everyone had enough of the pizza eating and people watching shinnangans and we left to Cami’s house. And that’s where the game was made up to kill. Kill some time that is. Since we are all 21-23 year olds, we all desperately just wanted to crawl into our beds and sleep off the pizza but felt lame for admitting that at our age, so we all forced ourselves to stay there and have fun and laugh and act young and lively, even if it hurt.

8:00pm Kylee: I have a game we can play. It’s called Whose Got It? Everyone grab your purse.

8:00pm Everyone else: HOORAY! *a very tired and very, very forced hooray*

8:01pm Kylee: I am going to call out something and the first person to bring it out of your purse, wins.

I’m not going to take the time and list of everything that she called, and also for legal reasons, but I will tell you the items that my purse obtained that won me the game:

1. Something you can start a fire with.
2. Something that can be worn on your feet.
3. a receipt from a gas station.
4. Something green.
5. Something with my last name on it.
6. a hockey ticket.
7. a written note.

After what seemed like hours of playing that game….

Me: "What time is it?" I asked hopefully expecting to hear at least 9:45pm.

Cami: "8:50pm" said Cami, sounding awfully disappointed herself.

Everyone else: "GAAHH!!! WAAHH!!!" said the rest of us through our groans and wimpers... and tears.

What the hell we were going to do for another hour and ten minutes?? Don’t know how we managed but 10pm finally came and we were walking around downtown looking for the Metropolitan.

10:01pm THE METROPOLITAN HAS BEEN SPOTTED!!

10:03pm Once we spotted it, we went in and all dove for a secluded, lonely table. I sat at the table admiring my friends and felt thankful I have friends that are as just as antisocial as I am.

10:05pm Realized I was sitting there smiling at them and probably making them uncomfortable since I was silently admiring them and their antisocial habits. The only thing that was missing was sentimental music.

10:07pm Okay, we can go.

When I got home that night, I loaded my purse full of objects for the next time we are killing time and playing Whose got it? Everyone should prepare to lose when she calls out toaster or blender! 

Muwahaha!!!

photo of the day #101

Doe! A Deer! An uninvited deer.

bits of my weekend.

I loved this weekend because:

1. I ate pizza from the Pie.
2. I ate Sushi. (not pictured, my apologies)
3. I ate some PEEPS. ( these are pictured, you can point and lick your lips with me)
4. I ate a lot.


I didn't love this weekend because:
1. Since it was daylight savings time I had to go  through my entire apartment and change all the clocks. Who cares about losing an hour, changing 5+ clocks is the real heartbreaker!

2. I was disappointed.

3. Lost a little bit more faith in humanity.

Speaking of the Pie... today's date is PI!! March 14th... 3/14... 3.14 ya see?

So here is a slice of pi for you:

My, that is a whole lotta pi(e) for one picture.

a to-do list for you.

Here's what you do:

1. Go to urbandictionary.com

 2. Type in *your name* in the look up any word spot.

3. Read the definition of your name.

4. Think it's cool.

5. Think I'm cool for telling you to do it.

I did it. I'm still surprised that there was a listing for my name. Sweet! I want to hug and maybe kiss whoever put my name on there. Why am I so excited that my name is on there? Because Reader, for 21 years of my life, I've never had a mug, key chain, pen, pencil, t-shirt, etc with Kaleena on it. I had to sit and watch all my classmates with names like Ann or Ben show off all their accessories with their name on it. I've always had to have the lame ones that say #1 Kid or Diva. 

Behold:

Kaleena
	Female name, generally used to describe an artistic, free spirited, nerdy, open minded, amazing girl. She is one badass mofo. ex: Kaleena, though awesome, needs to send me my photos.

spending a day down in the dumpies.

“…And then he almost hit me with his car, with his kids in the car! He was like this far away from me *points to how close* And I was like, man, I just wanted my laptop back. We like broke up on Sunday night and I just want my laptop back, people who don’t date shouldn’t take laptops without asking. The cops came and now I can’t see my kids anymore, I don’t have my laptop and I almost got run over. I think the cops are still after me too. Yeah, I think they are.”

That’s the response I get Reader, for asking the Top Stop lady person how she was doing yesterday while she helped me pay for my morning donut.

I didn’t really care for her story. At that time of morning, I only have one care and it is for my donut. So I just made appropriate facial expressions where it sounded like they needed to be and peppered in some occasional “what!!”  and “no, way.” and “is that legal?”

Note to self: Never ask how anybody is doing that is working at a Top Stop. AGAIN.

Maybe that’s why I was down in the dumpies yesterday. Surely, Top Stop employee is more in the dumpies than me, but still.  

I mean, it started out to be a great day… I didn’t have any bad luck in the morning traffic like I usually do… That meaning: I didn’t even have to shout ‘whore!’ from my window at a girl who almost crashes into me and everyone else on the road because the text message is just so important she can’t tear her eyes from it to drive.

But somewhere something went wrong.

Maybe it’s because I listened to Octopus’s Garden by the Beatles two times in a row.

Maybe it’s because at my work desk I am surrounded by ‘I am an unhappy middle-aged woman and I hate my husband and am a choc-o-holic’ banter for 8 hours straight.

Maybe it’s because somebody asked if the freckle in my eye was real. Is there a way to have a fake freckle… in an eye? I didn’t think so either.

Maybe it’s because I tripped up the stairs when nobody saw, which to me is more embarrassing than an audience watching you trip up stairs. 

Maybe it's because I put my friend's new cell phone number in my phone incorrectly, so I was sending awkward text messages to the wrong person until they kindly sent back Just stop.

 

I have been walking around like this all day:

Sad George-Micheal from Arrested Development

Cheers to a better tomorrow.

first sign that your nephews are awesome and basically adorable:

They have a picture with lightsabers, like this one: 

that one time at target.

Reader, I am very insecure about some things in life. One of those things, is when I am the store buying feminine hygiene stuff. I've been known to put unnecessary items in my basket just to hide the damn things.

After many years of thought, I really believe that they should make some sort of cover to put over them so not everyone has to stare at them when you purchase them. I've tried out some ideas out of my own, but it usually ends up with me looking like I'm stealing. I mean really, It's not that I'm immature or anything... it's just I get embarrassed easy... and once I place them on the conveyor belt at the checkout and watch them glide slowly, so painfully slow, to the store employee, I feel like everyone in the line behind (and the whole world!!!!) knows too much about me. Sometimes I've been tempted to yell "oh my, what is that!!?" and point in the other direction.

Tonight, at Target, lovely lovely Target. My home away from home, I was in that particular aisle. I was wondering how and why there so many different products for the same thing and I was approached by like a 17 year old boy plastered in acne with metal for teeth. Very cliche.

"Are you finding what you are looking for?

"....... yes?"

"My name is Jake, let me know if you need any help."

Please Jake, please. Just leave.

Jake, I applaud you wanting to give me wonderful customer service but really you couldn't have chosen a more UNCOMFORTABLE and awkward time.

Reader, I hope this didn't make you uncomfortable... cause I was a little uncomfortable typing this. Little steps, right?

Also, did anybody watch Even Stevens on Disney? Yeah? Well, remember the pesky little pest named Beans? Well this is him now.... brace yourself....

his name was blade.

I needed an auxiliary cord for my new car. That’s right! My car has an auxiliary port to play my iPod! So this is what the high rolling fancy life is like...

I ventured down to the local Radio Shack to get me and my car an auxiliary cord. As I was approaching I saw what appeared to be an unflattering skinny 40 year old lady with blond hair to her shoulders. I made a mental guess that her name was probably Pamela and would get upset if you called her Pam for short. Pamela was vacuuming.

I entered the store and Pamela turned around.

Pamela was not an unflattering skinny 40 year old lady with blond hair to her shoulders. Pamela was an 18 year old male with blond hair to his shoulders.

Blade? Is that you?

I looked down at his name tag and guess what his name was Reader? BLADE. And you know what? I bet he didn’t have  a last name, much like Prince and Cher. His name was Blade.

Anyways. Blade was too good for customer service. He also was very feminine. I walked up to him to inquire about auxiliary cords and he stood there sitting on one hip with his head tilted to the left, texting… while vacuuming and my did he vacuum with attitude and sass.

Me: I need an auxiliary cord?

Blade: (eye roll accompanied with a dramatic tossing of his hair) Just this way.

As Blade exhaled ‘just this way’ I smelt every bit of his dinner, which was probably some sort of fish smothered in onions and garlic.

Blade: Here are your options. The only difference are the lengths.

After waiting for Blade to finish his 5-7 minute texting spree, he finally came to the register to complete the transaction.

I will forever remember him as Blade with no last name.

I pulled out of the parking lot with my car doing a complete nose dive into the concrete. I was not used to driving a petite car, I had been driving an SUV for six years that had clearance the height of a small child. In my defense, that was one helluva dip to get out of the place.

bits of my weekend.

I loved this weekend because:

1. I spent my Saturday in bed reading. Some people think being lazy is a bad thing. And I disagree.

2. It was rainy and cloudy and stuff. It's my favorite.

3. My favorite Easter candy is now in stores, PEEPS!! It's a marshmellow covered in sugar shaped like a bunny or chick, of course I love it.

I didn't love this weekend because:

1. I finished my super-awesome-fantastic book and now I don't have anything to read for the time being. So until then, you can find me in the kitchen reading... food labels or something.

2. I saw a guy in his car brushing his teeth (wtf) and instead of spitting out the tooth paste... he swallowed. 

3. Something or someone was in the apartment on Saturday trying to kill me. Nobody else saw or heard it, but it doesn't mean it wasn't real!! 

and i quote.

I just finished Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close. i didn't want the book to end, I read the last page as slowly as possible... as if it would make it last forever. I'm in denial. If you have been searching for a wonderful read that you just can't put down the book even if you have to go to the bathroom or drive your car, well you should put it down if you are driving, but still. Read this one. I'm telling you, READ THIS BOOK! Or don't, whatever.

When I was reading this book, I wrote down all my favorite quotes. Because... I love quotes. Some of these deserved to be printed out and framed. Beware Reader, you are about to be quoted to death.

“We laughed and laughed, together and separately, out loud and silently, we were determined to ignore whatever needed to be ignored, to build a new world from nothing if nothing in our world could be salvaged, it was one of the best days of my life, a day during which I lived my life and didn’t think about my life at all.”

“If I’d been someone else in a different world I’d done something different, but I was myself and the world was this world, so I was silent.”

“Our laughter kept the feathers in the air.   I thought about birds.    Could they fly if there wasn’t someone, somewhere, laughing?”

 “I did not need to know if he could love me.  I needed to know if he could need me.”

“Humans are the only animal that blushes, laughs, has religion, wages war, and kisses with lips.  So in a way, the more you kiss with lips, the more human you are.”

“Songs are as sad as the listener."

“I like to see people reunited, maybe that’s a silly thing, but what can I say, I like to see people run into each other, I like the kissing and the crying, I like the impatience, the stories that the mouth can’t tell fast enough, the ears that aren’t big enough, the eyes that can’t take in all of the change, I like the hugging, the bringing together, the end of missing someone…”

“I thought, it’s a shame that we have to live, but it’s a tragedy that we get to live only one life,"

“So many people enter and leave your life,  hundreds of thousands of people! You have to keep the door open so they can come in,  but it also means you have to let them go.”

“You cannot protect yourself from sadness without protecting yourself from happiness.”

“It’s the tragedy of loving, you can’t love anything more than something you miss.”

“Feeling pain is still better than not feeling, isn’t it?”