Hi.
I went on a date tonight. It was really fun! I have already been out with him like 4 times... I mentioned him on here before. Anyway, it was fun. We went to City Creek Mall (an outdoor-ish mall) and people watched and guessed people's names. We are pro at people watching and he thinks I am gifted when it comes to guessing names. I don't want to brag but I am pretty great at guessing names.
I feel good about it. There is still a lot I need to think about... not just about me and him but mostly what I even want. I've lived life with and without a boyfriend... they both have their ups and I think for the time being I am really okay with the life without a boyfriend. When you are in a relationship for so long... you kind of lose your "own" identity because you are so used to being as one with your spouse; doing EVERYTHING together. I want to get to know myself again because sometimes I even surprise myself with the things I like or no longer like. And sometimes when I sit down and have a good think about the things I do and do not want (not just in a person but in life) things get confusing and I end up not really knowing what I want. Ugh. It's kind of hard to know what you want from someone else when you don't really know what you want in life. Does that make sense? Probably not. But welcome to my head.
I went on a date tonight. It was really fun! I have already been out with him like 4 times... I mentioned him on here before. Anyway, it was fun. We went to City Creek Mall (an outdoor-ish mall) and people watched and guessed people's names. We are pro at people watching and he thinks I am gifted when it comes to guessing names. I don't want to brag but I am pretty great at guessing names.
I feel good about it. There is still a lot I need to think about... not just about me and him but mostly what I even want. I've lived life with and without a boyfriend... they both have their ups and I think for the time being I am really okay with the life without a boyfriend. When you are in a relationship for so long... you kind of lose your "own" identity because you are so used to being as one with your spouse; doing EVERYTHING together. I want to get to know myself again because sometimes I even surprise myself with the things I like or no longer like. And sometimes when I sit down and have a good think about the things I do and do not want (not just in a person but in life) things get confusing and I end up not really knowing what I want. Ugh. It's kind of hard to know what you want from someone else when you don't really know what you want in life. Does that make sense? Probably not. But welcome to my head.
3 comments:
It makes sense, and I think that's totally okay. I think it's okay to just be you and not have a significant other. And I think the fact that you're okay with that shows how stable you are. I know some people who never really were okay with that. Good for you. :)
Oh it totally makes sense. I say as long as you're continuing to have fun, just keep doing that.
Sometimes I read your blog and think "This is totally my life." Which is super comforting and super therapeutic and I love it.
...in a non-stalker way.
That's all.
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