photo of the day #33

Yeah? Well I can... um... I can... tap my head and rub my tummy and the same time. HA!

i can tell that we are gonna be friends.

Me: "I like how the Pokemon, Ekans, is snake spelled backwards."

Steve: "I don't want to brag, but I knew that back in 5th grade."

Me: "So did I... I was just... saying."

Steve: "Uh-huh, I'm sure you did."

Me: "From now on when I sneeze, i'm going to put some Pikas in front of it, like: Pika... pika... (at this point my eyes would be gradually closing) pik...ACHOO!"

Steve: "I'm choosing not to respond to that."

----

Up until this point my life, I thought I wanted to be an Interior Designer. Then, Jack Johnson's, We're Going To Be Friends, shuffled onto my iPod. Does anyone still listen to Jack Johnson? When it came on my imagination perched me on it's back and carried me away. If I was a kindergarten teacher I would be Miss K. I would line the students up and measure their height everyday and keep a chart of how many teeth they've lost and wait patiently for my TEACHER APPRECIATION gifts. I would probably even be guilty of starting classroom rumors to turn the kids against each other, you know, for in-class entertainment.

Now, I can't decide between playing house in other people's houses and getting paid for it or pulling crayons (cray-on not CRAN) out of children's noses.

Aaaaaand crayon nose pulling wins. Only because the idea of helping with arts & crafts and getting the glue on my hands and peeling it off is too enticing. 


Reader, I've been blogging since February and I just discovered the joy of Scheduled posts brings. How did I miss this? I regret to inform you that you'll probably never read a live post again. Actually, that's not true. I apologize, I take that back.

a fall photo walk

 Above: Bikeman.

 Above: Self portrait from rear-view mirror.

 Above: Another self portrait. Wishing I could comb my bangs through this screen!!

photo of the day #32

"Local bull seeks revenge, leaves several injured and wet."

i just choked on a big ball of regret.

Reader, I regret choosing the name of my blog as quickly as I did. I feel the same way I do when I shout BINGO prematurely. I also wish my blog was anonymous. Fiddlesticks, anonymous is an obnoxious word to spell!

I fantasize of all the names that could've been for my corner of the internet. It's too late now. If I were to change Just Add Kaleena now, it would be the equivalent of picking up a 13 year old dog from the pound who has responded countless times to the name, DeShawn (day-shaw-n) and suddenly renaming him..... Spot. It's something you don't do! People would be left scratching their heads, DeShawn would have an identity crisis etc.

Put the bag of Doritios down, close your eyes and imagine this. You are en route to my blog and something is different. You are no longer reading Just Add Kaleena. You could be reading:

Just Minus Kaleena
Just Divide Kaleena
Behind Green Eyes
Captain's Blog
Paint it Black
Why Are You Looking At This Blog When You Could Be Reading or Re-enacting Harry Potter?
Warning: Blog is missing interesting content.

You see? Only some of those were for real... but I won't say which ones.

Attention: I want to declare that I will only follow your blog if I'm sincerely curious of what you have to express. I'm not one of those bloggers who will follow to get a follower.  Kthanksbye.

FWD: An email forward for a blog post.

More often than not, when someone is telling me a story all I can think about is that I can't wait for them to finish so that I can tell my own story that's not only better, but also more directly involves me.

Nothing sucks more than the moment during an argument when you realise you're wrong.

Have you ever been walking down the street and realised that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one close by thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the pavement.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

Is it just me, or are 80% of the people in the "people you may know" feature on Facebook people that I do know, but I deliberately choose not to be friends with?

Sometimes, I'll watch a film that I watched when I was younger and suddenly realise I had no idea what was going on when I first saw it.

I think everyone has a film that they love so much, it actually becomes stressful to watch it with other people. I'll end up wasting 90 minutes shiftily glancing around to confirm that everyone's laughing at the right parts, then making sure I laugh just a little bit harder (and a millisecond earlier) to prove that I'm still the only one who really, really gets it.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

I would rather try to carry 10 plastic grocery bags in each hand than take 2 trips to bring my groceries in.

Rubbing the batteries always releases more power. Always.

Lol has gone from meaning, "laugh out loud" to "I have nothing else to say"

I have a hard time deciphering the fine line between boredom and hunger.

How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?

Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.

I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

Bad decisions make good stories.

Whenever I'm Facebook stalking someone and I find out that their profile is public I feel like a kid on Christmas morning who just got the present you knew Santa could never afford . .546 pictures!? Don't mind if I do!

Why is it that during an ice-breaker, when the whole room has to go around and say their name and where they are from, you get so incredibly nervous? I know my name, I know where I'm from, this shouldn't be a problem....

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you've made up your mind that you just aren't doing anything productive for the rest of the day.

There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.

I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my document that I’m sure I did not make any changes to.

"Do not machine wash or tumble dry" means I will never wash this ever.

I hate when I just miss a call by the last ring (Hello? Hello? F@#k sake!), but when I immediately call back, it rings nine times and goes to voicemail. What'd you do after I didn't answer? Drop the phone and run away?

I like all of the music in my iTunes, except when it's on shuffle, then I like about one in every fifteen songs in my itunes.

As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.

Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.

I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

I wonder if the police ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.

I think the freezer deserves a light as well.

35 beginner buffalo, 15 bbq.

Have you ever sneezed while looking straight up with your head? Ouch. I just did.... on... accident.

Do you know what is better than absorbing fifty chicken wings? Devouring fifty chicken wings.

The Wing Coop [insert angelic chorus here] has this thing. It's not just any thing. It's a deal called the All American. You get fifty wings with your choice of sauce and three large sides. (I promise this is all going somewhere).

Yesterday, one thing led to another and at about 6:30PM, Steve and I found ourselves eagerly skipping and whistling through our door with fifty wings with our choice of sauce and three large sides. While we were nibbling on the wings, I saw an orange thingy on my white scarf. I thought, Wow, I've been so captivated by these wings I didn't see I was dripping buffalo sauce and ruining items around me. Upon further inspection, what I saw made #6 on my "Most Scary Encounters With Spiders" list. An orange spider. On my scarf. Just there, like it was wanted. I got up and locked the doors, we couldn't risk having any more spiders coming in.

I spent the rest of the night balled up on the couch, with orange lips and finger tips.

photo of the day #30

Hiking: You're doing it wrong.

when dessert and arcade characters meet...

Kaleena: "Cheesecake --- NOM. NOM. NOM."
Pac Man: "Dove Chocolates --- NOM. NOM. NOM."

and i quote

"A hero is no braver than an ordinary man, but he is brave five minutes longer."

"The more I see of mankind, the more I like dogs."

"You have enemies? Good. That means you've stood up for something, sometime in your life."

"Worry gives a small thing a big shadow."

"If you want something said, ask a man. If you want something done, ask a woman."

"A person who aims at nothing is sure to hit it."

"You can discover what your enemy fears most by observing the means he uses to frighten you."

photo of the day #29

Duck, duck.... possessed kitty? That cat wants your first-born.

it's my blog, i'll make a hate list if i want to.

I hate washing the spatula after I make scrambles eggs. I swear, when eggs and heat mix, it creates some sort of super duper glue that will not come off my spatula. Then, said spatula gets drop kicked into the sink where it will soak  and mock me until I'm ready to face it in a dual.

I hate when me and Steve eat a 30 pound (not really) cheesecake in two days and I don't know whether to brag or hang my head in shame... or go buy another one. I'll be right back...

I hate that I went 21 years before experiencing the Back to the Future series. My 21 years now seem meaningless. My life has more color, my food has more taste.

I hate when I have nothing else to blog about so I have to join the emo teens and make hate lists.

I hate that I was laying down in bed this morning eating M&M's, out of breath from the walk to get them.

I hate that I got out of bed just to get M&M's. 

I hate that I didn't use the ranch in our fridge for months and the one day I need it... it's one day expired.

photo of the day #28

Don't you hate it when all you want in life is to sleep in your bed but there is a dinosaur already in it?

number 9.

October 9th, John Lennon's birthday. Have you heard all the SPOOKY and WEIRD things that the number 9 is associated to John Lennon?

John Lennon was born on Oct 9, 1940 in Liverpool.
L-I-V-E-R-P-O-O-L is 9 letters long.
He was born at 6:30 pm ... (add the three numbers).
John's elementary bus was #72  . . . 7+2 = 9
McCartney - his best friend, is spelled with 9 letters. Lennon met yoko on November 9th 1966.
The song or piece - Revolution #9.
John Ono Lennon and Yoko Ono Lennon's combned names contain nine O's.
John lived at apartment 72 in new york. (add the 2 numbers. . .)
The Beatles broke up after 9 years, in 1970.
John and Yoko's son Sean was born on 10.9.1975.
When Lennon was shot on 12.8.1980, it was already 12.9 in liverpool, his birthplace.
Beatle's Rockband was released on 9/9/09.

You guys, I just got goosepbumps.

what's in my bag

Hope, tagged me to do this feature called, What's In My Bag? You wanna see what's in my bag? Well I'll SHOW you what's in my bag! So, to all the muggers in the world, here is a sneak peek a head of time, in case you read my blog and want to rob me. I warn you, you will be painfully disappointed... especially if you look in my wallet for money, you'll probably feel obligated to leave me money rather than take it.

What was that? Oooooh! Things in my purse I use day to day? Ooooh, okay, okay. I got it. I was thinking of my other bag....