fear.

the only sound sweeter than a child's laughter...

Is the sound of peace and silence!

ha.

After living with Shandey and my two nieces (Lola and Molly) for a month, it kind of made me realize I don't want kids and how much I enjoy solitude. They are the sweetest, most well behaved kids, but I honestly don't think i'm cut out to be a mom... mostly because I'm just a really big kid myself. And I'm really selfish with my time and "wants". I don't think I have the patience or the maturity (yet). For example, Molly is the cutest baby ever but when I'm holding her on my lap and she drools, I cringe and pass her to my sister so i can run away.

Maybe in 5-10 years I will feel differently and be ready to not be selfish and have some kids, but right now, I just don't feel like it's right for me.

Today is my last day staying at Shandey's house. In conclusion of this month, it has been decided that I will not be going to chicago anymore :(

I'm very sad at this news.

The reason being is my brother in law is too stressed about the move and that having me apart of it was too much I guess. But if anything, this is just an ellipsis... there is still a great chance I will be moving there after they are settled and he is no longer stressed.

my life is a little bit ruined.

The weekend was great and now it is over! Just wanted to get that obvious statement out of the way.

So... why my life is a tiny bit ruined. My friend e-mailed me at work today and asked if I knew what a skinwalker was. Bless. What a frightening thing it is. Like, TERRIFYING. I'm no expert on the skinwalkers, but from what I read on the internet it is really disturbing and scary and I hope I continue to live my life without encountering a skinwalker. I'm not going to go into the details here... mostly because I get scared easy and I don't want to scare myself by writing about it, so If you want to know more, please just Google 'skinwalkers in Utah'. Apparently they are huge on a few ranches in Utah.

I'm really happy these days and it's all because of little bunny Lou. Whoever said money doesn't buy happiness obviously has never used money to buy a bunny.

We watched the movie Taken last night. Made me super excited for the sequel. If you didn't know there was going to be a sequel, well now you know.

I made the decision to go from medium auburn hair to intense auburn hair. Here it is:

 

photo of the day #125

Once you see it, you'll know you will never sleep again.

via.

boo.

I don't care if i'm 22 years old and am technically an adult. Adults are supposed to be brave and pay bill on time and make sure there is always toilet paper in the bathroom and not be scared of silly things. I however, AM an adult and it honestly would be easier to list the things I'm not afraid of as opposed to all the things that usually keep awake at night, terrified. So, here is a list of things that make me scream, run away, cry, faint, hide, and sometimes.... all at the same time.

+The dark.

+Spiders.

+Thunder.

+Drawn on eyebrows.

+Bad breath.

+Poor grammar.

+Responsibility. 

+Kids.

+Odd numbers. (surprise, surprise)

+Losing my teeth.

+People without teeth. Including babies.

+Being alone.

+The doctors office.

+My imagination. 

+Ferrets. 

+My shadow.

+Body odor.

+People who aren't registered to vote.

+Garbage trucks.

+Turtles.

+Earwigs. 

+Bears.

+The ocean.

+Space.

+People who don't use CTRL codes. 

+16 year olds.
+Poodles.

mind tricks.

It's been raining here since Tuesday.

Or Monday... I can't remember....

This is great because it happens to be my most favorite weather.

Cloudy skies? Bring it on.

100% chance of showers? Oh yes, please.

Road closed due to giant puddles? Wonderful!

However, it's not great when you are home alone and thunder accompanies the rain.

Thunder still scares me, but only when I'm home alone.

So, I painted my nails to distract me. 

I chose Revlon: cherries in the snow.

This weekend I am planning to wake up and watch the sunrise again.

Oh yeah.

And next week I am starting a raw diet.

I'm really nervous and eager and I hope I follow through.

Wish me luck.

photo of the day #101

Doe! A Deer! An uninvited deer.

photo of the day #68

Note to self: NEVER challenge a hippo to a game of tag.

the one where my shower was ruined.

Remember that one time I wished for a genie? Well I thought of another wish I would wish from genie. I wish I could be in the shower all day. You can think this is weird, because it is weird. But I cherish showers the way some cherish their cats.

Tonight, somebody (a very scary somebody) didn't want me to enjoy my nightly shower. Noooo, they didn't just want to ruin my shower, they wanted to torture me, reduce me to tears. There I was--walking down the hall with dreams of the hot water, loofas, brown sugar & fig soaps, etc, and there it was. A colossal, black, long-legged SPIDER, just making it's ugly self comfortable in OUR shower. I wanted to explode with fright. How do you stop an exploding (wo)man? The jerk probably had it planned all along. He knew.

Did it stop there? No, *sniff* it didn't stop there. After getting Steve to vacuum that effer out of my kingdom... err.. my shower, every. single. thing that would graze me, I imagined the most horrendous spider known to my imagination. Every droplet of water tormented me, it changed me! My usual 20-25 minute shower was diminished to a pathetic ten minutes.

Tonight will forever be remembered as: The incident.

Spider: 99 Kaleena: 0